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Rep. Mitch Greenlick, a Democrat from Portland, has an awesome idea: making cigarettes a Schedule III controlled substance. Wanna light up? Maybe you can spend a year in jail, courtesy of the taxpayers! Or pay a $8250 fine.

“I hope it passes and I hope people actually think about it,” said Rick Cannon of Salem. “You know there’s less and less smokers everyday because they know how bad it is for them, so I just hope people wake up and realize how bad it actually is for them.”

Just wait until the tax income from tobacco dries up and the state has to find new ways to crawl up your ass to steal money from you.